Review by T.Austin
But for those of us who sadly run out to see the new Transformers, Box Office success doesn't mean quality. This is quite evident with the dare I say it premature Fifty Shades film. Here are five reasons it might not make your passing grade:
The cliched love story doesn't hold up
Kudos to new star Dakota Johnson (daughter of Melanie Griffith) and Jamie Dornan who exhibit natural chemistry, even during the overly hyped love making scenes, but even the stars' on-screen charisma wouldn't stop the average moviegoer from seeing through the paper thin love story. We've seen it 100 times on Lifetime. A nerdy, not too attractive female is swept away by stunningly handsome wealthy man. It's like Beauty and the Beast but with whips, chains and an even more psychologically damaged Beast. The twist of course is his offer of a contract to engage in sadistic sexual acts but for anyone with a television, the trailer gives it all away so that when it actually happens there's no dramatic change in the beat of the film. It all seems too familiar and tediously cliched.
Takes too long to get to the point
If you've read the first book, you know that much has been removed. That's probably the reason the entire film drags along with not much happening (except the overly advertised bondage scenes). Every now and again we hear a very loud pop song and get a series of montages with the happy couple flying in a helicopter or some other 'Billionaire shows poor girl he's rich' cliche. It gets very exhausting after the first hour. I had to fight off sleep about 6 times.
The Love Making Scenes don't exactly 'satisfy'
For all the hype about the film's graphic depiction of sadistic sex between Anastasia and Christian, when it actually happens it's not exactly eye opening. Yes, there are gross amounts of nudity particularly from Dakota Johnson (more about that later), but for anyone with cable and a subscription to Showtime or HBO the sex scenes are really nothing new. Yes it is surprising to see certain acts hinted at, but with all the PR and commercial hype, the scenes are actually quite tepid.
The soundtrack does most of the work
As I said before, the film has a huge achievement with the amazing chemistry between the two leads, however beyond that there's really not much happening. To create some sense of excitement the film makers employ a series of upbeat pop songs including a truly catchy track from British pop singer, Ellie Goulding. All this makes the movie seem less genuine and it's hard to take it seriously when Christian brands his whip and a super slowed down version of Beyonce's 'Crazy in Love' starts playing. It all seems very commercial like watching the latest teen drama on MTV.
Sets Feminism back several years...
The same has been said about the books and indeed the depiction of Anastasia Steele is sometimes hard to swallow. To avoid any spoilers I won't give details of a particular scene where I was surprised at how they treated the 'virginity issue'. It just seemed like the female protagonist was so enamored that she barely gave a thought to sleeping with someone she barely knew. In 2015, it's hard to accept this sort of 1930s approach to women and sex. While Johnson tries her best with the material, it's clear that Anastasia represents a stereotypical female lead that has long over stayed her welcome in the movies.
The other glaring negative depiction of women is the fact that while we see quite a lot of Jamie Dornan, it doesn't compare to the amount of times Johnson's body is on display in overtly submissive ways. The fact that Johnson's nudity is emphasized more than her male counterpart just plays into the typical Hollywood stereotype of excessively depicting women as sexual objects. This will not sit well with an intelligent audience.
Overall, Fifty Shades comes across as a way too soon book to film adaptation that needed more time to be fleshed out properly. Everything about it seems forced and contrived, lacking any deep wit or groundbreaking plot device. Most audiences, particularly if you haven't read the book, will be bored by the light weight plot. Beyond the charming performances by the leads, up tempo soundtrack and enthusiastic music score by Danny Elfman, 50 Shades is a dismal snoozefest.
Review by T.Austin
